Just Five Minutes

Triggered by a request to complete a survey on poetry - a usual as with so many online surveys, hosted by the SurveyMonkey service.

I get on well with the Gorillas, great guys, great guys

I even like the Orangutan, you know, the one who runs the library

But those monkeys, it’s them I just can’t abide

They used to be all ‘no speak, no hear, no see’, kept themselves to themselves you see

And I didn’t mind that, at least they didn’t bother me

Still, when someone gave them a computer, I was hopeful

Like cousin George I was curious

If we waited long enough, what might we see

Maybe the works of Shakespeare, some new wondrous sonnets

All re-rendered in strange simian form

How disappointed were we

Instead it’s ‘Just 5-minutes’, ‘Just a few questions’, ‘A few moments of your time’

Have you...? Did you...? How did you...? What do you think...? Which do you prefer...?

Just 5 minutes - now page 4, page 5, page 6, almost there, page 7, a few more, nearly complete

How did you hear about us? Don’t worry, it’s anonymous. We won’t tell but we need to know

No ape is safe, no primate too high, non ape too low

The survey monkeys have descended from the trees

The survey monkeys can type

The survey monkeys are infinite

They just want 5 minutes, and another 5, then some more

Now… Did you like our poem? Could you answer a few questions?

Just 5 minutes is all it will take...